Part I: Spiritual Seekers and Spiritual Teachers

• 1 Cultural Considerations

  • The Typical Spiritual Seeker in Traditional Tibet

  • Joining a Tibetan Monastery or Nunnery in Traditional Tibet

  • Joining a Monastery or Nunnery Nowadays in Exile

  • Traditional Tibetan Monastic Training

  • The Traditional Spiritual Life of Lay Tibetans

  • The Contrast with Western Spiritual Seekers

• 2 The Traditional Meaning of a Spiritual Teacher

  • The Rectification of Terms

  • The Derivation of the Words Guru and Lama

  • La as a Cosmic Force

  • The Full Original Meaning of a Lama

  • Other Uses of the Word Lama

  • Reincarnate Lamas: Tulkus and Rinpoches

  • Lamaism and the Traditional Social Role of Tulkus

  • "God-Kings"

  • Tibetan Humor

  • Spiritual Friends

  • The Buddhist Concept of Friendship

  • Geshes and Kenpos

  • Summary

• 3 The Traditional Meaning of a Spiritual Seeker

  • The Implications of the Sanskrit Terms for Disciple

  • The Meaning of Being a Teacher's Getrug

  • The Starting Point for Becoming a Disciple

  • The Necessity of Correct Understanding and Conviction in Rebirth for a Disciple to Aim Sincerely for Liberation and Enlightenment

  • The Necessity of Correct Understanding and Conviction in Rebirth for a Disciple to Reach Even the First Stage of Spiritual Development

  • The Place of Conviction in Rebirth in Entering a Disciple-Mentor Relationship

  • Entering a Disciple-Mentor Relationship while Aiming for Spiritual Goals Only in This Lifetime or Also for Future Generations

  • Stipulations for a Beginner Disciple to Aim Provisionally for Nontraditional Goals

  • The Difference between Becoming a Disciple of a Spiritual Mentor and Becoming a Client of a Therapist

  • Inappropriate Usage of the Term Disciple

  • The Realistic Attitude of an Authentic Disciple

• 4 The Different Types Of Spiritual Teachers and Spiritual Seekers

  • Premises

  • Terminology

  • Buddhism Professors

  • Dharma Instructors

  • Meditation or Ritual Trainers

  • Spiritual Mentors

  • Refuge or Vow Preceptors

  • Mahayana Masters

  • Tantric Masters

  • Root Gurus

  • Progressing through Graded Relationships with Spiritual Teachers

  • Summary

• 5 The Need for Various Levels of Spiritual Teachers on the Sutra Path

  • The Need for a Buddhism Professor

  • The Need for a Dharma Instructor

  • The Need for a Meditation or Ritual Trainer

  • The Need for a Spiritual Mentor

  • The Need for a Combination of Sources of Inspiration

  • How Sources of Inspiration Work Together

  • The Relation between a Spiritual Mentor and Buddha-Nature

  • How Inspiration Activates Buddha-Nature

  • Inspiration from Oral Transmission

• 6 The Special Need for a Spiritual Mentor in Highest Tantra

  • The Special Role of Oral Transmission in Tantra

  • Diverse Methods for Inspiring Disciples

  • The Deepest Need for a Tantric Master

  • Clear Light Mind as a Type of Buddha-Nature

  • The Inner Guru

  • The Need for a Root Guru

  • The Ultimate Aim of Progressive Relationships with Spiritual Teachers

  • Summary and Conclusion

Part II: The Dynamics of a Healthy
Student-Teacher Relationship

• 7 Establishing a Relationship with a Spiritual Teacher

  • The Intended Audience for Graded-Path Texts

  • Evaluating Material from the Graded-Path Texts

  • Different Levels of Guru-Meditation Taught in Graded-Path Texts

  • The Qualities of a Spiritual Teacher

  • Thorough Examination

  • The Qualities of a Spiritual Seeker

  • Formalizing a Disciple-Mentor Relationship

  • Expectations in a Disciple-Mentor Relationship

• 8 Sutra-Level Guru-Meditation

  • The Applicability of the Meditation

  • Focusing on Good Qualities while Not Denying Shortcomings

  • The Analogy with Looking out a Window at a Passerby

  • How to Meditate on a Mentor's Good Qualities

  • The Definition of Believing

  • The Three Ways of Believing That a Mentor Has Good Qualities

  • The Constructive State of Mind That Results from Believing a Fact

  • The Relation between Believing a Fact to Be True and Liking It

  • Being Firmly Convinced of a Fact

  • Appreciating the Kindness of a Mentor

  • Requesting Inspiration

  • The Seven-Part Invocation

  • Practicing Guru-Meditation before Finding a Spiritual Mentor

• 9 Relating to a Spiritual Mentor with Actions

  • Translating Trust and Respect for a Mentor into Actions

  • Supporting the Work of a Mentor

  • Helping a Mentor

  • Showing Respect

  • Taking the Advice of a Mentor

  • Honoring the Authority of a Mentor

  • Emulating a Mentor

  • Rectifying the Term Devotion

• 10 Overcoming Emotional Blocks in Developing Trust, Appreciation, or Respect

  • Applying Sutra-Level Guru-Meditation to a Faulty or Abusive Teacher

  • Reviewing a Teacher's Faults and Mistakes

  • Creating a Protected Mental Space for Addressing Spiritual Wounds

  • Examining the Appearances That the Mind Creates

  • The Analogy with Contextual Therapy for Victims of Abuse

  • Teachers Involved in Controversy

  • Overcoming Emotional Blocks in Appreciating Kindness

  • Overcoming Emotional Blocks in Showing Respect

• 11 Seeing a Mentor as a Buddha

  • The Relation between a Mentor's Functioning as a Buddha and Being a Buddha

  • Mentally Labeling a Mentor as a Physician or as a Buddha

  • The Nonliteral Use of the Label Buddha

  • Progressive Levels of Interpretation

  • The Meaning of a Tantric Master's Being a Buddha

  • Viewing One Phenomenon Validly from Different Viewpoints

  • The Meaning of Inseparable

  • Inseparable Impure and Pure Appearances

  • The Basis for Labeling as a Buddha the Pure Appearance of a Mentor

• 12 Advanced Points concerning Seeing That a Tantric Master Is a Buddha

  • Basis, Pathway, and Resultant Viewpoints

  • The Viewpoints Typical of the Four Tibetan Lineages

  • Undefined Usage of the Terms Impure and Pure

  • Beyond Good or Bad

  • Transforming Negative Circumstances into Positive Ones

  • During an Empowerment, Seeing That a Tantric Master Is a Buddha

  • Seeing That a Tantric Master Is a Buddha in Gelug Empowerments

  • Causal, Pathway, and Resultant Empowerment

  • A Tantric Master's Being Inseparable from a Buddha Versus a Tantric Master's Having Attained Enlightenment

  • Seeing All Teachers as Buddhas

  • Actualizing Enlightenment through Seeing That a Tantric Master Is a Buddha

  • Specific Explanation regarding Empowerment and Generation Stage Practice

  • Complete Stage Practice

  • Introduction by a Tantric Master to the Nature of the Mind

  • Guru-Meditation Relevant for Beginners in the West

Part III: Unhealthy Relationships
with Spiritual Teachers

• 13 Overdependence and Rebellion

  • Avoiding Overdependence on Others for Spiritual Energy

  • Cultural Factors in Western and Tibetan Overdependence

  • Overdependence Based on a Western Orientation toward Ethics

  • Overdependence on Guided Meditation

  • Overdependence on Having All Questions Answered for Oneself

  • The Issue of Submission

  • Gender Prejudice

  • The Influence of Ancient Greek Thought on Being an Individual

  • Tension over the Freedom to Be Creative

• 14 Transference and Regression

  • Description of the Phenomena in Classical Psychoanalysis

  • The Phenomena in Disciple-Mentor Relationships

  • Resolution of Problems Arising from Transference and Degenerative Regression

  • Further Steps in the Resolution Process, Suggested by Contextual Therapy

  • Pleasing a Spiritual Mentor

  • Deeper Resolution through Voidness Meditation

  • Countertransference

  • Responding Maturely to Countertransference

  • Summary

• 15 Fear in a Disciple-Mentor Relationship

  • Fear of "A Breach of Guru-Devotion"

  • Self-Destructive Actions regarding a Spiritual Mentor

  • Transgressing Tantric Vows concerning Interaction with a Mentor

  • Hellish States of Mind

  • Fear within a Western Context

  • The Reason for the Descriptions of the Hells

  • Fear Related to Issues concerning Dharma-Protectors and Tulku Candidates

  • Deciding Extremely Obscure Issues

  • Resolution of the Disciples' Dilemmas

  • Deciding Sensitive Issues Pertaining to Karma and Discipline

• 16 Blocks in Opening Oneself to a Spiritual Mentor

  • Paranoia and Vulnerability

  • Systems Analysis

  • Openness from the Side of the Mentor

  • Dealing with the Death of a Mentor

  • Inflation, Projection, and Idealization

  • Devotion

  • A Mentor's Actions as Inconceivable

  • The Difference between Seeing That a Mentor Is a Buddha and Projection

• 17 Generational and Life Cycle Issues

  • Stages in the Contemporary Life Cycle

  • Stages in the Spiritual Life History of Baby Boomers

  • The Spiritual Life History of the Me Generation

  • The Spiritual Path of Generation X

  • Avoiding Problems Typified by Provisional Adulthood

  • Avoiding Problems Typified by First Adulthood

  • Avoiding Problems Typified by Second Adulthood

  • Those in Second Adulthood Can Help Inspire Provisional Adults

Epilogue: Relating to a Western Spiritual Teacher

• Authorization of a Western Spiritual Teacher

• Following a Middle Path in Intercultural Student-Teacher Relationships

• A Student-Teacher Relationship between Two Westerners

• Showing Respect to a Western Spiritual Teacher

• Generational Differences in Ways of Showing Respect

• The Disciple-Mentor Relationship in the Context of the Practical Realities of a Dharma Center

• A Student Working Personally with or Indirectly for a Western Teacher

• A Disciple/Assistant Living with a Western Mentor as an Apprentice

• Western-Style Friendship between a Disciple and a Mentor

• Western-Style Life-Partnership between a Disciple and a Mentor

• Conclusion

Appendix: Summary of the Stages of Expanded Sutra-Level Guru-Meditation

Bibliography

• Sanskrit and Tibetan Sources

• Translations and Secondary Literature

Preface: Historical Survey of the Interaction between Western Seekers and Tibetan Spiritual Teachers

• Initial Contacts between Western Seekers and Tibetan Spiritual Teachers

• The Establishment of Dharma Centers and the Start of Confusion

• Further Forces Leading to Misunderstanding

• The Rise of Unhealthy Relationships

• The Approach Suggested for Revising the Student-Teacher Relationship

• The Present Book